The Curious Urinal Monday 9/27/2010

Sesame Street Not Friendly to Hookers

Katy Perry's cleavage cost her a spot with Elmo on "Sesame Street." The long-running kids show decided to ax a song by "California Gurls" singer, siting that her attire was not child-friendly. Elmo said after taping the song, "I was not comfortable with her being dressed like a common streetwalker."

There's no word if Miss Piggy was upset with Kermit the Frog, who offered $20 for a half-hour of ribbits with the singer after the taping.

It seems that Big Bird, as well as Burt and Ernie, protested the appearance. All three carried signs that read, 'We don't like Kissing Gurls!'

Local Restaurateur recovering from injuries

The owner of Sven Jorgensen’s Cajun Sushi and Chinese Buffet is in the Buzzardbait Hospital and Lawn Care Center, recovering from what doctors believe is a severe case of hand cramps and a groin pull. The incident occurred last Friday evening when Sven was whipping up a batch of secret sauce to pour over the latest addition to the menu, Panty Flake Surprise, when he began getting debilitating cramps in his right hand.

This also caused the groin pull apparently, as his grip would not loosen. Aside for some minor blistering in the groin area, doctors were able to loosen the cramped hand with Crisco and the Jaws of Life. Mr. Jorgensen should be released from the hospital as soon as he can pay the bill.

In other news around the area

Local Blues Singer, Milo Days, will be appearing at the Strikes and Suds Bowling Lanes this weekend. His show, called The Milo Days Blues Revue, will be in the bowling alley's lounge. He will perform two shows per night. Tickets go on sale tomorrow. They will cost $10 each in advance, or $7.50 at the door on the days of the show.

Also, Sammy Shagnasty and the Naked Molecats will be performing at the Strikes and Suds the following weekend. Tickets will be given away by WBZZ Radio, 895 on you’re A.M. dial.