The Curious Urinal - 10/28/2011

LOCAL MAN HAS BIZARRE
MEDICAL CONDITION
By Staff Reporter Juan Motyme

A Buzzardbait man has a rare condition. His scrotum has swollen to more than 150 pounds.

Won Hung Lo, born in China, moved to America when he was a small boy with his parents. His parents died in a tragic blender accident, leaving Won to grow up in the Buzzardbait Home for Unwanted Children. Upon leaving the home at age 18, Won Hung Lo went to work in the kitchen of Sven Jorgensen's Cajun Sushi and Chinese Buffet as a sushi chef/busboy.

With his love of food and the tutelage of Sven Jorgensen, Won Hung Lo became a highly respected member of the community.

But all of that changed overnight.

After a tragic accident involving a walk-in freezer door, Won Hung Lo developed a problem that has kept him indoors and away from work for going on two years.

The 150 pound Lo doubled his weight overnight. His scrotum had swollen to 150 pounds and looked like a sack of watermelons that dangled between his legs.

Since Won Hung Lo will not allow himself to be seen in public in this condition, The Curious Urinal decided to call upon the poor man on the phone.

He explained that while attempting to close the freezer door at the restaurant, he inadvertently closed the door on his testicles, causing him extreme pain.

When I asked him how he was handling his self-imposed exile from the outside world, he stated, "It makes me a little crazy!"

Whereas I replied, "I bet your half nuts!"

Won Hung Lo needs $1,000,000 to have an operation to reduce the size of his scrotum, and the plastic surgery to make him appear normal again.

Donations are being accepted at Sven Jorgensen's Cajun Sushi and Chinese Buffet for the Won Hung Lo Swollen Scrotum Fund.


In Music News

For those of you that love show tunes,

Zombie Pizzeria - The Musical

has released a greatest Hits CD

Set in an Italian Pizzeria in post-apocalyptic New York, Zombie Pizzeria - The Musical looks at life, and the afterlife, with humor, song, and a heaping helping of Pepperoni, Brains and Blood!

This Classic Broadway Musical was cut short by the economy (and lack of interest), but the fantastic music can now be yours on CD.

Who could forget these timeless classics?

Circle of Afterlife  (To the tune of Circle of Life)
Zombies Ate My Neighbors (To the tune of Gemme 3 Steps)
I Should Have Ate Their Brains (To the tune of I Should Have Danced All Night)
Zombies Keep Gnawing on My Head (To the tune of Raindrops Keep Falling on My Head)
That's a Zombie (To the tune of That's Amore)
And the show stopper -
Everybody Runs From Zombies Sometime (To the tune of Everybody Loves Sombody Sometime)

These classic musical numbers can be yours from Buzzardbait Records Ltd.
Just send $9.99 plus $5 Shipping and Handling to:

Zombie Pizzeria - The Musical
1234 Way Up on the 2nd Floor
Buzzardbait, KY

Please wait for 6-8 weeks for delivery

This Edition of The Curious Urinal has been brought to you by:

Tres Equis

Buzzardbait Brewing Company - Buzzardbait, KY

And finally

It's here!

All three of the Star Wars
Movies are parodied in
one book.
Catch it on Kindle
at the following link:

http://www.amazon.com/s/ref=nb_sb_ss_i_0_8?url=search-alias%3Ddigital-text&field-keywords=starr+warped&sprefix=Starr+Wa